Surfin' on a Rocket.

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Hang up. Now.

I also do the DMSI program at work, which is basically taking orders for the Sears catalogs.

Some ghetto lady calls in and she's all like, "Yeah, I gots a question before I orders anythang." So I get out the catalog to try to be of further assistance. *snort*. So I have the catalog open and everything.

Blockhead: "Yeah, awn page fitty-seven, dey's a round ruhhhg. And it say 5 by seven. Dat a big ruhhhg?"

Me: "It's however big the catalog states."

Blockhead: "Yeah, but it big?"

Me: "It's a matter of opinion, ma'am. The measurements are given on that page."

Blockhead: "Yeah, but then dey's another one dat say 4 by 6. Dat big?"

Me: "As I said ma'am, I can't really say for you. It's an opinion. And hang on, the 4 by 6 one? I don't see that."

Blockhead: "It right dere, in da picture."

Me: "Oh, you're on page 56 now."

Blockhead: "Yeah, dat's what I say-ed."

Me: "Actually, you were initially talking about the rug on page 57."

Blockhead: "But which one is the 4 by 6 one?"

Me: "The round one that it shows on page 56."

Blockhead: "But it say 5 by 7."

Me: "That's the one on page 57. The round rug pictured on page 57."

Blockhead: "But why do it say 4 by 6?"

Me: "Ma'am. The 4 by 6 one is the one you see ... in the picture ... on page 56. The 5 by 7 one is the one you see ... in the picture ... on page 57."

Blockhead: "Which one is it?"

Me: "The round ones."

Blockhead: "Thank you."

Me: "Anything else I can do?"

Blockhead: "No, because I don't like your attitude."

Me: "Okay."

*click*

Really people, if you just LOOK at the fucking catalogs before you call, you wouldn't have to waste your time or get my "attitude".

And as Ben would say, "If you remember making that call, fuck you very much."

3:16 p.m. - 2003-09-15

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